Is It Possible to Live a Balanced Life?

January is Balanced Life month, and for many of us, that just seems like an impossibility. Sure, after I finish looking after my partner/kids/pets/finances/housekeeping/laundry/chores/etc. and preparing healthy meals and exercising, I’ll go get a balanced life! Productivity in the workplace, here I come! And then I’ll finally have time for me.

Weird how that “time for me” never comes, huh?

What a balanced life really is

By now, we’ve figured out that you really can’t have it all, at least not at once. (Right? It’s a myth, just like multitasking is.) Expecting to do everything you want whenever you want in the modern world just isn’t feasible. Not even for those of us who don’t have kids or a partner to contend with.

For a variety of reasons, and not all of them positive, Americans tend to think of things in terms of the short term, not the long term. So you might believe that a balanced life means each day is (somehow) balanced between work, parenting (if applicable), developing your relationships with your spouse/partner (if applicable), social events, and hobbies. 

Theoretically, that’s great. But you still have to sleep, and eat, and get some physical movement in. You have to spend time getting dressed, brushing your teeth, taking a shower, and so forth. It’s hard to cram all that into a 24-hour day. 

And let’s face it, a lot of American corporations aren’t helping. They’re starting to demand that workers come back to the office, even when it’s not necessary. People are productive in the workplace, but also at home. Companies still tend to have rigid schedules, demanding that you spend your eight hours a day, or more, working for the same amount of money.

You might be tempted, as many are, to skimp on sleep or exercise in order to create more hours in the day. That’s another short-term “fix”, but it doesn’t actually solve anything. In the long term, you’re likely to end up sick, injured, and/or burned out. Which begs the question of how you get everything done in a day.

The answer is, you don’t, and the best way to look at a balanced life is from the 30,000 foot view. Over the long term, in other words. Not every day will be balanced, so let go of that expectation. Hopefully, you’re feeling freer already!

And what does “balanced” mean? In the financial planning world, a “balanced portfolio” can mean 40% of the portfolio in bonds and 60% in stocks, or 50% in each category, or 60% in stocks and 40% in bonds, or 40% in stocks, 40% in bonds, and 20% in alternatives… and so on.

Therefore the question isn’t so much “What does balance mean” as “What does balance mean to you?” Is a balanced life one where you spend the same amount of time working as you do sleeping or “at home”?

Is it?

Is it really?

Is it REALLY?

Or is life for living, being with the ones you love, doing activities that are interesting and fun for you, resting when you need to, going to the beach/mountains/desert/cultural hotspots that you enjoy, and learning new things?

Balance and productivity vary along your “lifeline”

At different times of your life, your priorities may shift. You might be more work-oriented before age 70. Depending on your life situation, you’ll probably spend more time parenting in your 30s and 40s. 

Even when you’re more work-oriented, there may be some circumstances where work has to take a back seat. Your illness, or that of someone close to you, may require rounds of treatments or surgeries at the hospital. Or it’s a sick kid you need to take care of, or an ailing parent. 

Even though now is my time for my business, I did very little work when my mom was diagnosed with bone cancer and for a few months after she died. Maybe it set my business back a little bit, but I don’t regret it. I needed that time, and I’m glad I had it. 

When someone close to you is really going through it, there’s no shame in stepping back a bit from business to take care of them. I suspect you would regret not doing so to your dying day. 

But sometimes you're the one really going through it, and you need to take care of yourself.

Productivity in the workplace, like balance, starts at home

Prioritizing is key not only for feeling like you’re more in balance, but also for getting stuff done without working more hours. You can fill up every hour with busy work … or you can prioritize what really needs to be done and leave yourself time for things like playing with your pets or going to dinner with your friends to catch up.

What do you need to feel like you’re in balance? (Hint: the answer is not “more work”, unless you’ve been out of the working world for the past year.) Maybe you need to talk to your kids/parents/spouse every day, or every week. Or have time for your favorite hobby, even if it’s only on the weekends. 

Most people don’t feel like they need more house cleaning, meal preparation, grocery shopping, or more laundry to feel balanced, and those are not high priorities for most business owners. What to do? Delegate (unless those are sources of joy for you.)

Maybe your partner or kids pick up the slack on cleaning and laundry and cooking. Or, you hire someone or some thing to do the job for you: a robot vacuum for cleaning, for example. Take the laundry to a laundromat where they do it for you. Hire a housekeeper. Shop for groceries online, and if it makes sense, subscribe for items you often run out of. 

Yes, it’s more expensive. If it frees you up for the things that really speak to you emotionally and help you destress, wouldn’t it be worth it? (Hint: the answer is “yes”.)

Recharging and taking care of yourself are productive things to do

Being able to relax when you’re home and do things that you enjoy make you more productive in the workplace. Modern culture is very good at hiding this fact and pushing for more work and less resting and recharging. But that doesn’t mean you have to succumb to it.

Yes, you need to be a little brave to avoid cultural messages and take your life back. It may just take you a little bit longer to figure out what balance really looks like for you in general, as well as what balance looks like this day, this week, or this month. Grinding away at work only grinds you down.

If you’re a business owner, right now you may need to prioritize work because you’re trying to get your business off the ground or in a sustainable place. That’s perfectly great! However, you still need to make sure you’re getting some recharging time when you can and that you don’t let your sleep or exercise habits go to make room for more work. Certain things are non-negotiable, at least if you don’t want to burn out or get sick.

Recap:

A balanced life doesn’t mean that you have to stress about what’s happening today. Priorities and productivity will help you at home and work, so pay attention to them and avoid grinding yourself down into burnout.